I feel dead inside.
I am having all these health probs I'm assuming related to my ed. I could finish my workout. I thought my heart was going to stop it hurt so bad. I could breath and I couldnt stop shaking. I lost it. Balled my eyes out. Nate my amazing friend grabbed ahold of me calmed me down and talked me out of where my head was taking me. At first when he was talking to me all I could think about was how I wanted to cut myself. By the end of it I felt so much better. I promised him I wouldn't cut this weekend. I hope I can keep that promise. Idk wtf do wrong with me that I couldn't do that workout. Seriously. Wtf.
So angry that I couldn't/didn't finish my workout. Im a waste.